QUESTION: What does it mean that one may not contradict a parent? If my father makes a mistake, am I not permitted to correct him?

ANSWER: There is much discussion in poskim as to the parameters of this halacha. The Prisha (YD 240:3) writes that it is only forbidden to contradict a parent if one does not have proof. You should not argue with your father just because you feel that he is wrong. But if there is definite proof that a mistake was made in religious matters, then one is obligated to point this out. The Gemara has many examples of Tana’im and Amora’im who disagreed with the rulings of their fathers because they had proofs to the contrary. Pischei Teshuva (YD 240:1) writes that if a father and son are studying Torah together, the son may argue with his father even without a proof, since this is the method of delving into Torah.

The Be’er Sheva (Sanhedrin 110a) writes that it is permissible to disagree with a parent, but it must be done in a respectful manner. Not contradicting a parent means that one should not say, “Father, you are wrong.” Rather, one must always speak to a parent in a respectful manner.

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The Gerald & Karin Feldhamer OU Kosher Halacha Yomis is dedicated to the memory of Rav Yisroel Belsky, zt"l, who served as halachic consultant for OU Kosher for more than 28 years; many of the responses in Halacha Yomis are based on the rulings of Rabbi Belsky. Subscribe to the Halacha Yomis daily email here.